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Have you lost all patience with your kids? Losing patience with a child is easy to do. Especially when you have more than one and especially when you are overwhelmed (which most parents are). You probably want to know, “Can yelling at a child be harmful?” and “How can a parent be calm and patient?”
These things and more are answered here, so don’t run off…
Being a parent of three has its struggles. Let me just tell you.
These struggles are intensified when you are a working mom or working dad.
You try to remain calm and practice patience. But it’s hard to not get frustrated at your kids when you are trying to discipline them.
You want them to understand the difference between right and wrong.
You want them to learn responsibility so they can grow to be self-sufficient adults.
And when they refuse to do what you ask or push back against your requests and challenge your authority, it’s easy to lose your temper and get angry.
And that’s why you’re here – trying to figure out how to be more patient with kids.
Here is an overview of what is covered below:
- Why is patience important in parenting?
- Can yelling at a child be harmful?
- Losing patience with your child – is it normal?
- How to be a more patient parent
You will also find some great tips for being more patient with your kids so you can be the best parent you can be.
Why is Patience Important in Parenting?
Patience in parenting is a necessity.
While it might be nearly impossible to remain calm ALL.THE.TIME. patience is a required “skill” if you want to teach your kids anything.
If you’ve been a parent for a few years, you know that kids can sense fear and frustration.
I swear, every time I get a little overwhelmed and it starts to show through, my 5-yr-old tries to test my authority.
Of course, this only makes the situation worse.
Sometimes it escalates to yelling because it seems that’s the only way he will listen.
Then I worry,
Can yelling at a child be harmful?
There has been research that concludes yelling at children can negatively affect their behavior.
In the study, yelling or scolding by the mother resulted in child reported aggression.
Corporal punishment, such as spanking or paddling, resulted in child aggression and anxiety.
In other words, parental discipline techniques play a huge part in your child’s emotional responses.
Obviously, yelling at your child on a regular basis isn’t a good practice. But, don’t beat yourself up if you occasionally lose your temper and let it slip.
We are all human. We all make mistakes.
And that’s just another life lesson our kids will learn.
Losing patience with your child, is it normal?
Yes. It’s completely normal to lose patience with your child.
After all, they act and react without regard for others feelings and test boundaries every chance they get.
It’s only natural to feel frustration and overwhelm.
Parenting is seriously a battle of emotions sometimes.
Now, please don’t misunderstand that as an excuse to go crazy and lose your cool every time your child disobeys.
Losing patience with your child is bound to happen. But there are some things you can do to practice being a more patient parent.
How to Be a More Patient Parent
Being a more patient parent will require some practice and self-awareness.
For many it will require creating new, better habits to replace the old ones.
It’s easy to get wrapped up in the heat of the moment. For the most part, this happens when you aren’t feeling so great about yourself.
Here are some tips to help you work on being more patient.
Tips for Being More Patient with Your Kids
1. Know your triggers. As an individual with your own life experiences, there will be certain things that make you more upset than others.
Be aware of these triggers so you can avoid them or so when they come up, you can be prepared and better handle the situation.
2. Ask for help. When you’re tired, overwhelmed and feel like you are taking on the world by yourself, ask for help. If grandma, grandpa, aunt or a friend offer help, take it.
Stop being so proud. You don’t have to do it all yourself. When you feel good about yourself, you will be able to better handle tough situations without getting so worked up and inevitably overreacting.
3. Practice mindfulness and gratitude. Take time out of your day to appreciate the life you have. This will help you focus your thoughts and energy on positive things and will result in a less stressed you.
4. Have age appropriate expectations. Kids will be kids. By learning about child development and what to expect at each age, you will be more patient and understanding with your child.
5. Step away from the situation. It’s inevitable that you will get upset and yell at some point. When this happens, step away from the situation. Re-evaluate the root of the frustration.
A lot of times, taking a moment to think through it will allow you time to calm down. Then you can approach the issue with a resolution.
6. Ignore bad behavior. Sometimes children act out in order to get attention. By ignoring bad behavior and acknowledging the good, eventually your child will want to behave good.
7. Explain your expectations. Talk to your child and explain how you expect them to act. Explain how the things they do affect others and the different outcomes they could have.
Being the Best Parent You Can Be
If you want to learn how to not lose patience with children, the work starts with you.
You have to decide you want to be a more patient parent and put forth the effort to get there.
The Patient Parent Book
Before you go, I wanted to recommend this resource for you to have more actionable tips and relatable scenarios at your fingertips.
This book has been a saving grace for so many parents struggling with how to be more patient with their kids.
If you want to be one of those parents and stop struggling with losing patience with your kids, check out this great resource: Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids – How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting.
You won’t regret it.